Mont Tremblant

Yesterday I got a text from my best friend.  She lives in Canada near to where we grew up with her family.  She wants to register for the Mont Tremblant Half Iron and she wants me to register with her. 

If you've read my posts, it was the 2013 Mont Tremblant Ironman where I saw her compete with my sister and Brother In Law.  That's where I started taking my running seriously, that's the race that I thought "I can do this, I really can".  So when she asked me, I gave it some serious thought. 

Mont Tremblant is a beautiful part of Quebec (seriously, I think all of Quebec is magical and wonderful) but MT is particularly beautiful.  It is a great destination for a first half Iron.  It would also be amazing to not only train with my best friend, but also be able to cover some serious miles with her.

I think having her as a training partner could really help motivate me as she could cheer me on and pick me up when I'm having bad days.  This race apparently sells out in hours of registration opening so when I said I wanted to think about it, I really didn't have a lot of time since registration opens at 9am on Monday. 

And then reality set it, and I actually cried.  Even though I've come a long way since struggling to run to the gas station 2 years ago, I am not capable of this race.  I ran the numbers and I can't make it in the allotted amount of time.  I am just too slow.  And since I am not confident that I can make up the time needed to finish in the 10 months until race day, I had to say  no to her, which actually broke my heart.  I know it goes against the Ironman motto of 'limitless' but I think that this is a race best set out for those who really want it.  Those who really want to put aside the time to make it work.  And reality is, I am not that person.  Are these excuses?  Probably.  But in the end, I guess I just don't want it badly enough.



So where does that leave me?  Another year without an Ironman that I want so desperately in my heart.  Reality hurts sometimes.  But I know that if I registered for it, and trained my butt off, there is still a real possibility of a DNF.  Some may say "who cares, at least you had the courage to start", which is true, those who start and get a DNF are very brave people, all race starters are.  But you have to remember, I don't have the self esteem to do that.  Maybe one day I'll cross that finish line.  But I think I also have to be OK with myself if I don't.  I have to be OK with what I have accomplished and save the hard core stuff for the hard core people.  Respect for my BFF of 30+ years for taking on this challenge again.  A working mother of 2 completing her 4th half Iron is something we should all respect and admire - I certainly do.